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salam satu malaysia hikhik kalau ada yang perasan aku ada publish a new post before this one but i decided to revert it into a draft again because i thought well it was stupid lol. if there's one thing i can't stand for the life of me, aside from people, is stupidity. even if it was from my behalf lulz. anyway, moving on. 1. i've visited Fakulti Perubatan dan Sains Kesihatan (FPSK) minggu lepas? minggu lepas to minggu lepas? lol. dah lama actually but malas nak cerita kat sini je. The place is-to put it shortly is my goal. one of my goals. before this cuma mampu google je gambar fakulti tu but this time i got the chance to actually visit it. the faculty is magnificent, it was huuuugee, bangunan yang menempatkan labs and classes and lecturers rooms dia ada dalam 7-8 tingkat i'm not sure. but one thing is, all the while i was there, i felt like the faculty agak...lonely? and deserted. rasa macam terasing dari dunia luar and bila dah lama-lama aku kat sana aku rasa agak depressed...lol. and here i am convincing others that i'm an introvert that only like the company of herself and one to two friends at a time. maybe because it was quite a gloomy day that day..it was raining and stuff. maybe bcs aku dah terbiasa dekat sini, the heart of the university, one yang linked to a lot of other faculties. FPSK and Faculty of Veterinary Medicine-senang cerita kolej 17 memang terasing dari fakulti lain. bergaul dengan kaum sendiri senang cerita. kaum budak med. But! all in all, i was thrilled. i was only a few footsteps away (literally) from Kolej 17, the place i want to be next year, in sha Allah. dapat tengok dari luar (buat masa ni) pun jadilah haha. anyway, i was quite dissapointed i didn't get to lawat bilik mayat dia harhar. dapat masuk bilik anatomi je. ingat ada some gruesome stuffs but it was pretty mild for me lol. 2. it felt sort of like deja vu? being here. dulu ada jugak terlintas pasal bila dah besar nanti, i'll get out from the little, placid city i called home back in Johor and move to bigger, extravagant place like in here. Bila aku lawat putrajaya dengan other budaks from my kuliah haritu, baru it hits me. i'm here, at the heart of the city, i'm no longer at home. felt kinda weird..anyway, Putrajaya is gorgeous. i like how quiet it is. almost deadly so. at night, especially. kinda nice to think about how when it was 1am and you can't sleep so you decided to have a night walk, along the Seri Wawasan Bridge. it was damn pretty lah at night. seriously. the purple lights. i'm gonna sound like a rusa masuk kampung lol. but sucks being a girl especially in this era. tak pernah selamat huhu. sometimes i really wonder how much easier life would be if i'm a dude. and on another note, Masjid Besi is sooooooooo breathtakingly beautiful. seriously. rasa terharu pun ada hahahaha over. serious rasa macam nak nangis bila masuk masjid tu haritu sebab cantik sangat huhu. so yep thats it i'm moving to Putrajaya in 10 years. its official. 3. I FINALLY GET WHAT I ASKED FOR SINCE LAST YEAR yeah! its a dude, or a crush, that i can look at all lovingly with heart eyes emoji and stuff. liking him made me realize that the Gee song by SNSD after all, does makes some sense. i'm experiencing it rn lol. i really, really, really, really fuckgn like it when he smiles. his eyes would disappear into crescent shaped slits. hah amik kau keluar terus ayat novel aku harhar. and then and then his cheekbones are quite high so when he smiles, that cheekbones of his naik and and also his eyes sparkle. ugh he smiles like a child, basically. grinning to be precise. i like his voice also. honestly kalau boleh record suara dia dah lama aku record hahahahaha. and then play it on replay everytime i need a cheering up. it wasn't deep, i prefer voices that aren't too deep tbh. and it wasn't too soft. its quite high pitched too, come to think of it. in short i like just about everything about him and i had went too deep there's no coming back, i've fallen into a great depth of a pitch black abyss and help me not. okay that's it i need to study lol. adios.
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