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tadi tiba-tiba a line of word pop out inside my head. "you can be as weird as you want!! or you can be basic as you one!! " and i decided to write this heartwarming-tears evoking-thought provoking (ah nabilah you praised yourself too much) (no i don't) (wait on the second thought maybe i did) (who curszz) short essay. i don't see anything wrong with being basic, average, ordinary, plain jane, provided if you are being who you truly are. if you're not as weird or hipstery enough, that's okay! being weird and hipstery is overrated anyway. there's too much people claiming themselves as special snowflakes. why be special snowflakes when you can be your own type of snowflake? see-there's a difference between being different and being yourself-sure; being yourself makes you different; but being different doesn't necessarily means you're being yourself. Its okay to listen to the 'mainstream' songs on the radio, i kinda despise people who put others down because they themselves have 'better' music taste. music taste is subjective anyways. though trashy musics are pretty much set in stone. if others put you down just because you tried speaking/writing english don't give those ungrateful dipshits a damn. there's always a room for improvement. and to those who just-like me-plain weirdos; there's no such thing as being too weird. I've been there once-always have this need to remind myself to tone my weirdness down so that other people won't judge me for that (oh my god i shouldn't have say that now they would think i have a screw loose somewhere) (oh my friends like to talk about fashion and make up so i have to force myself into liking them too!) i remember trying soooo hard to blend in, to be one of them and i remember how at that time, i've never been really genuinely happy. I'm terribly insecure (and i care what people think) (did u see what i did there. no? ok ;( ) and guess what? i started being genuinely happy after i stop trying to blend in. a.k.a fuck it i'm just going to be me. you shouldn't be afraid of showing what you're made of; your interest-even when they are as creepy as mine (cough serial killers cough) because in that way you can throw away all of those that are toxic to you and receive true relationships where you are loved for you are; instead of being judged. the 2013 me wouldn't say these things. especially about the plain jane part. i thought the more unique you are, the better it is. but no, you can't put on such mindset. tak payah bersusah payah tukar fesyen or dengar lagu-lagu indie yang nama pun orang tak pernah dengar. sometimes-no all the time, being you is what makes you unique. one person's uniqueness is not the same as others. #philosophical monday lol p.s i kinda feel like i'm actually an infp??? these things are def things that infp would say. they are renowned for being the types who advocates the value of staying true to oneself. but inferior fe is so me lol so i'm in dilemma. an mbti dilemma. adios.
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